Hearken back with me if you will, to last Wednesday.
It was a sunny day, the scent of sharpened pencils and fresh new possibilities danced in the air. Evy was debating with Mommy in the car about exactly how many pictures she was aloud to take during the first day (two). "And you're not staying like yesterday, Mommy, are you?"
"No honey," Mommy assured her wishing she was staying, trying to be brave.
They were a little early, Mommy secretly snapping pictures of her little treasure on the way into the building. After a few minutes the pair were in the classroom, Mommy doing her very best to hang back and simply watch (while sneaking in a few pictures). Evy bounded in confidently. She ran to her cubby, hung up her pink puppy backpack and put her snack in her bin. She got into a quick conversation with a little brown-haired girl about riding two-wheel bikes and it seemed an immediate friendship was formed. They sat down at a table and popped the caps of some markers. Evy's daddy sat down next to her for a minute or two. Mommy was near the door trying to decide whether to burst with pride or burst into tears.
A crier arrived and only momentarily distracted Evy from her picture. Mommy watched a bit envious of the crier's mom whose son seemed to need his mommy so much. But she knew in her heart she'd rather have things go for Evy the way they were. Daddy gave a quick kiss to his baby and headed out the door. "Do I need to stay for you?" he asked mommy on the way out. Some nearby moms chuckled knowingly.
Mommy did her best to hang back; wanting to leave to show her daughter she believed in her yet wanting with every fiber to stay and be close to her little angel.
Finally, she drew in a big, brave breath and walked ever so much more nonchalantly than she felt up to the little girl with the blond braids. "OK, Honey, Mom's going to leave now. Have a great day! I love you!" She resisted the urge to squeeze her and never let her go and instead planted a quick kiss on her cheek.
Mommy turned to leave..."Wait Mommy!" Evy called from the table.
"YES! SHE NEEDS ME! I'M NEEDED! SHE WANTS ME TO STAY!"
Evy snatched up a couple of papers and ran to her mommy. "Here. I drew you a picture. This one is for you. This one's for daddy. It's a girl in a wedding gown. Will you give it to him?"
"Sure, honey."
"OK. Bye Mommy!"
Mommy walked out the door, eyes swimming with tears from some unnamable emotion. She looked down at the picture her little girl had drawn. A girl in her wedding gown. In her heart, Mommy knew that day would come all to soon as well.
* * *
Evy had a great day at school. She made two friends and thoroughly enjoyed herself. Now a week in everyone is settling well into the routine. (Mommy is even beginning to like it!) Yesterday Evy had Spanish, and she's looking forward to Friday's trip to the gymnasium. Mommy was even bold enough to wait in the carpool line as opposed to walking in to pick Evy up. They're both learning a lot these first few days of school.
Tuesday, September 12, 2006
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7 comments:
things sound great min! I remember Gen's first day of kindergarten. It was a full day and i cried like a baby... i felt like life wasn't fair, i hadn't had enough time with her... maybe i should home school... maybe i should just stay always. The first week of school, since then, has always felt like that... i miss her. I rejoice when summer comes and we have our days together, again. :)
I am proud of your transitioning well. you are SUCH a GREAT mom!
She does still need you. It just doesn't feel like it. What a sweet start to her school career
I am so proud of you. You should feel proud too, you have given Evy the best thing a parent could, SELF CONFIDENCE! She needs you (she always will) but she isn't afraid either.
You are a great mom, I will echo Misty's words. Evy is well adjusted and confident because you ARE a great mom!!
I am proud of you too....for the letting go process....
What sweet time you get with Henry now too, that is awesome. I am looking forward to that time with Caleb when Adalai goes to school, although I'm sure the feelings you are having now will wash over me then....by that point you'll be a seasoned pro and I'll be calling ya ;)
Unnamable emotion - you hit the nail on the head with that one.
We're now trying to adjust to Noah's entrance into preschool (again, unnamable emotions).
You did good, momma ~
Unnamable emotion - what a perfect description for the lumps in our throats.
Good job, mom ~
I wept on Jonah's first day....I was a mess. Your story painted such a beautiful picture, I felt like I was watching from the wings!
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